Are Your Goals Superficial?

Do you feel overwhelmed when looking at what you want to achieve and say to yourself, where do I even start, or this is hopeless how am I going to achieve that, or even just have a whole bunch of ideas but have no idea which ones you really want to follow? I usually end up doing nothing because in all honesty it feels all to daunting to even start or we end up going around in these circles of busyness that are actually not productive at all. Is this you?

Firstly I want you to ask yourself if your goals are superficial or are they a deep internal desire of what you want to achieve? For example do you want a big house and be successful or are you looking at your goals in a way of achieving a way you ant to feel inside, as a way of creating your life?  I listened to a talk with Marie Forleo and Danielle LaPorte (go listen to it here) which got me thinking how most of our goals are just superficial and even if we achieve them we don’t always feel fulfilled.

That being said are you clear on what your inner desire goals are and how you are going to work towards those, are they vague or have you sat down and thought about how you would like to create your life and how to achieve that feeling of fulfillment by the things that you do? We can have all these ideas in our head but not know how to put them into action. I mean it should be simple right, well yes but its not always easy to get it out of your head and into reality. This is something I struggled with and got so frustrated with myself for feeling like I wasn’t achieving anything.

So what changed? Firstly I did a lot of soul searching figuring out what I wanted to feel and what would make me feel that way, I am still going through this process and I think it will be an ongoing process. Secondly I started to plan my week and realised when I had a game plan and stick to it things get done. Even with kids and the unknown that can helping involving them, I still manage to get done what I need. The other thing is I don’t over book my day to get unrealistic stuff done, I have space because I need space for the reality of being a mom, even if you are not  a mom give yourself space in your day, be realistic with your time so you set yourself up for success and not for failure.

How do you eat an elephant….? One small bite at a time.

Although, I wouldn’t eat an elephant, but take this as your life and goals, tackle them with consistent small steps/ bites.

Stop the comparison. The only one who can be you is you, it’s a gift only you can offer.

Another aspect that can make us feel like we are not achieving our goals is, with all the social media envy going on we tend to compare ourselves to what we see on other profiles and think to ourselves we would like a life like that, but have you looked at what that actually means for you. This for me is constantly feeling like a failure even when I had achieved a goal. Sometime this is because we are not appreciating the moment and thinking of the next best thing, but sometimes it is the feeling in the pit of our stomach going oh wow this is actually not really what I wanted, I didn’t think it would feel this way when I got here.

Here are some questions you can ask yourself when you are going through your goals and what you want to achieve within your life.

Why do you want to achieve your goals?

What is your deep down inside desire for you to reach them?

What will they add to your life?

So, are your goals superficial?

I haven’t read Danielle LaPorte’s book the The Desire Map yet, (it is on my list) but if you would like to dive deeper to work with your goals from an internal perspective I would suggest getting yourself a copy and reading it. Even just listening to her talk with Marie Forleo on YouTube will inspire you to look at your goals differently.



This article was written by Ashley Lagden, who has passion for movement, wellness and living your best life as a whole. She’s still on her journey to find her best life and would like to travel with you and help you on your way. 

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